I’ve always told myself that I couldn’t stand to marry a woman who wasn’t into dogs as much as I was. I’ve grown up with them, and they were pretty much my only friends throughout high school, because I was a weirdo. Don’t mind admitting that. But I’ve now broken up with two great girls who said they weren’t fond of dogs. Who isn’t fond of dogs? You’d have to be some kind of low-level sociopath to look at a puppy and not think it was cute.
I guess it’s not my place to say who can like what. Maybe I should look into the dog walking service in Melbourne. I see a lot of woman walking multiple dogs, and they often seem young and single and available, maybe. Not that I’m about to start hitting on every dog walker in the city, but sometimes, you have to explore your options where the picking is good. Or better yet, I could offer to help! I don’t mind helping out with a dog walk. Their scheduling must be complicated, and sometimes I guess you just end up with three rottweilers, a doberman and a newfoundland. It’s like a triangle of fights and powerful pulling. I just have to find a nice girl being pulled off her feet, and offer to help…and then we’ll start to fall in love, just like in that film where the guy and the girl meet in a cute way. You know the one. It was in the cinema.
Or maybe I’m setting myself up for a major fall, because then I’ll be implying that dog walking is something she needs help with. Maybe she’ll look like she’s struggling, but that’s just how that walk often goes for her, and she’s a strong confident woman who doesn’t need a man. Gosh, dog walking can be complicated, which I know from childhood. This romance is harder to find than I thought. Maybe I should just officially take up being a dog walker. Melbourne always needs those, right? All those rottweilers…