Holidaying with All the Kids!

hotels in LorneGoing on your holidays can be really tough with a big family. It’s great to have all the kids along, but finding a place to fit all of them can be a hassle! Oh, and they’re all dogs. All thirteen of them. Yeah, I may have brought this upon myself, but I have the funds and the land for it, and they were all rescue dogs. Now they have a home with lots of brothers and sisters, forever, yay! But yep, sure is a hassle getting them places! I’ve had to get a bus license, and a bus, and then make it dog-friendly inside.

As for holidays, I’m working on a cunning plan. Now, the accommodations down in the Great Ocean Road aren’t exactly equipped for that many animals. I should know, because I’ve spent enough time looking, but they DO have some chalets down by the sea. If I took all the fur babies down to the coast, and housed them in one of the largest chalets, it probably wouldn’t be enough space. But If I hired out TWO chalets, right next to each other, and then split my time between them…well, that makes things interesting, now doesn’t it? It might be labour intensive on my part, but this holiday isn’t for me. It’s for my sweet babies and their enjoyment. Though Gloria doesn’t really like new places, I’m hoping now that she’s befriended Rufus she can come out of her shell a bit more. That is, if Gustav stops bullying both of them whenever they’re together, which I personally think is because Gustav fancies her. That’s crazy by itself, of course…Ramble is so into him it’s practically transparent.

So they’re a handful, but it’s not like I can show up at some luxury accommodation in Lorne and expect a warm welcome. But I think Gustav, Gloria, Ramble, Rufus, Shelley, Uther, Klein, Humperdink, Oscar, Virgo, Xander, Terry and Sherry really deserve better. We ALL need a break!

-Cassabelline

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This Company Retreat Must Fall

conference centre VictoriaThe corporate retreat is a time for employees to, and I quote, ‘let their hair down and generally relax!’. The exclamation mark is not mine, obviously, because I do not engage in such inane punctuation except when actually necessary. This is a period in which employees may take a long weekend to recharge, get to know each other better and generally learn about business practices.

As much as the last portion of that appeals to me, I must put a stop to this scheme at all costs. The office has slipped out of my iron grasp for such an event to deal the deathblow this soon. I can tolerate function room hire for a night of pointless frivolity, but booking an entire conference centre, and one focused on relaxation? This I cannot tolerate. I WILL not tolerate it. However, the population at large seems enthused about this upcoming event, so cancelling it outright has stopped being an option.

I wonder, would it be possible to subtly sabotage the event? The business seminars I have seen, and I approve of the content. Perhaps they can be stretched to cover more of the day, perhaps even jutting into post-lunch time. I’m sure I could justify the insertion of more lectures, reducing the amount of leisure time and filling it with sweet, delicious productivity. Or rather, informative lectures that will lead to greater productivity in the future, so in the end I’ll win no matter what the circumstances.

Yes, that will be the first step. The relaxation features of the centre can be whittled down, forcing people to remain in work mode. Perhaps I can bring along urgent paperwork and coerce certain key employees into completing it. Mack will be a problem- nothing new there- as well as that social coordinating lout. They think they can take control of my office. Well, we’re going to have a marvellous and productive time at this convention centre. Just you wait.

-Sandrine

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The best retirement village

Lorne accommodationHaving retired in a vibrant little seaside village, I can safely say that everyday is a holiday. Whether it’s the peaceful period during the winter or the hectic time during school break, there’s always something on, something to do, some way to keep yourself entertained. Even just going for a walk on the hills is a wonderful, delightful experience. Living in Lorne I get the opportunity to embrace life and nature during my twilight years.

It’s always fun to watch from afar as the all the Lorne hotels fill with people, to talk to the owners and staff about their experiences with the ebb and flow of tourists in and out of the town. Everyone living and working here always has their own adventures, but whether those experiences are flattering or not depends on both the guest and the host. Be rest assured all the walls in this bustling country hub have a story to tell.

Every now and then, there are places in Lorne that function as renowned conference venues. It can be an unexpected dichotomy to see such focused, intent business people out here, in the fusion of village wilderness that Lorne embodies. You can always distinguish the conference goers from the tourists as well. Their whole air is different, their very way of being. The approach their stay with a completely different mindset, as you’d expect from someone going to a fantastic destination on a work trip. It’s just that they make it overwhelmingly obvious their trip isn’t about the destination, it’s about the conference. Sometimes I just wish they’d take a moment or two to enjoy the town itself. Of all the wisdom I could give to the young people of today, I would ask them to just enjoy the moment as it unfolds. Afterall, life is short, and experiences like this don’t come around every day of the week.

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